Saturday, January 17, 2009

#24 on my list of things to admit before I die?

I used to know what it was like to be normal. Well, somewhat. Maybe I never have been normal by worldly means, just normal for people... er... like me. 

I guess you could say that I once was an introvert. Never said anything out of place, never fighting back. I could sit cozy between the shelves of the library for hours, reading until my neck and eyes began to scream "Stop it!" I took whatever life threw at me at whatever point in time. Deep down, I was fiery, stubborn, overly independent. Maybe even a little rebellious to some? But I tried my hardest not to show it. Have I just stopped trying by now?

These achey pains are just so stubborn. I could consume a million cups of tea and yet they still will remain. My physical exhaustion, that feeling that it wouldn't matter how many days I could sleep and I would still feel icky, lingers constantly. BAH.

I would still so much rather be snuggled in between the pages of Shakespeare and Jane Austen than to have my nose crammed between the pages of an encyclopedia. I hate thesis papers. I hate 12 degree weather and clouds without an ounce of rain (maybe snow?). I hate whatever this is that is fighting inside of me. 

1 comment:

addy owl said...

Your words always seem to capture exactly what I'm thinking, Tuesday! From the hatred of the cold to dreaded thesis papers, you've done it again!

It'll get better, I hope for the sake of both of us. Let us wish for warm weather and lazy days, shall we?

x
Addy